PRIORITIZE YOU!

Hello my lovely readers! I hope your month is going well! I can’t believe that this weekend is already Memorial Weekend! Recently, a family member asked me what my plans were for Memorial weekend and I nonchalantly replied that it was still weeks away and I had no plans.  They corrected me and said it was next weekend. I gasped in horror and quickly pulled out my phone to look at the calendar. They were right, it was next weekend (this was last weekend when I gasped in shock). May has been a very busy month full of weddings, family gatherings, graduations, and other events. I don’t know about you all but I’m ready for my summer to calm the heck down and it’s not even summer yet! 

Besides a month full of weddings, graduations, and other various parties, May is also Women’s Health Month and it is also Mental Health Awareness Month. Two areas that I am passionate about and yet two areas that many people, especially women continue to struggle with.   Many women continue to feel gaslighted about their physical health when they see their doctors, are often told that “it’s all in their head” or told to “just lose weight” when we bring in concerns. When we hear comments like this, we start doubting ourselves, our experiences, and downplay what we feel and what we deserve. 

Our physical health has such an impact on our mental health. Comments above make many women believe that we are not important enough, that how we feel is not valued, and that our concerns are dismissive,  which in turn makes many women feel that they’re not worthy. I have seen this time and time again in both my professional and personal life and you know what’s even harder? When you are a woman of color (WOC) who is seeking professional services related to your physical and mental health.  The stories I have heard and even my own experiences as a WOC has made me feel dismissed, ridiculed, and downright invisible. 

To honor both Women’s Health Month and Mental Health Awareness month, I am doing something different this week. This week’s blog will focus on how our physical and mental health are interconnected. Most of my readers are aware that I am a mental health therapist that focuses on the importance of holistic health and how physical, mental, spiritual, and soul all are connected. When one area is off balance, it will impact the other areas of life. 

I want to preference that I understand that not all my readers share my view on this holistic approach regarding our overall health and I am okay with that. I encourage all of you to do what is best for you and how you want to approach your health; yet, I will say our physical health largely impacts our mental health and vice versa. You cannot do one without the other. 

Why is the topic of women’s physical and mental health so important? For many reasons!  Often, as women, we are the foundation of our families and communities. We are caregivers, mothers, leaders, and take on a lot of responsibility within our household and also outside.  When our needs are not met and we’re not doing well physically and mentally, it’s  a domino effect, it impacts everyone in our system. 

So what are some of the top issues concerning women’s health (both physically and mentally) and how does this show up in our daily lives that we may not even be aware of? 

• Chronic Illness: Mental health diagnoses such as  depression and anxiety can increase the risk of developing chronic illnesses such as heart disease, diabetes, and obesity. The stress associated with these conditions can lead to changes in the body, including increased inflammation and disrupt the immune function. 

• Hormonal Imbalances: This can be a hidden one! Many of us never think about our hormones but our mental health can affect hormonal balance, leading to problems such as irregular menstrual cycles, severe premenstrual syndrome (PMS), and exacerbated symptoms of menopause. Stress and anxiety, in particular, can disrupt the endocrine system, affecting hormone production and regulation. I don’t know about you all but in looking back at times when I had a lot of stress,  my period would often be late and I would have other added symptoms that just made me feel awful! 

• Sleep Disorders: Yep! I had to add this one. Why? Because this is so essential. Mental health conditions often lead to sleep disturbances, such as insomnia or hypersomnia. Poor sleep quality can weaken the immune system, increase the risk of cardiovascular disease, and contribute to weight gain. Doesn't sound fun at all and I am sure we all can relate to this at one point or another. How many of us have woken up too much on the wrong side of the bed and that sets off our shitty day or worse even our week?  Sleep is essential and one that cannot be trifled with! 

• Digestive Issues: Anxiety and depression can impact the gastrointestinal system, leading to conditions like irritable bowel syndrome (IBS), chronic constipation and diarrhea. How many of us have had to use the bathroom over and over and over again or worse, can’t go to the bathroom because we think and feel like we have a stomach ache but it’s actually anxiety? It’s an awful feeling to have digestive related issues due to your mental health. 

• Cardiovascular Health: Depression, anxiety, and chronic stress are associated with an increased risk of hypertension, heart attacks, and strokes. Unresolved mental health issues can lead to behaviors that negatively impact cardiovascular health, such as poor diet, lack of exercise, and smoking (been there and definitely done that, especially using ice-cream as my main coping food). 

Pain Perception:  When mental health goes untreated, it can influence the perception of pain. Women with depression or anxiety may experience chronic pain conditions, such as fibromyalgia or chronic pelvic pain, more intensely due to altered pain processing in the brain. When I used to work with women Veterans, over 90 percent of them had fibromyalgia and also had  a diagnosis of PTSD. Unfortunately, many of them were victims of some form of sexual assault during their time in the military and had PTSD due to their time in the service. Most of them had chronic pain and were unable to complete daily functioning tasks due to their pain. Is there a correlation of the mind and body? Definitely! 

• Lifestyle Choices: Ooof! I can relate to this one 100%! I’m sure all of us can!  Poor mental health can lead to unhealthy lifestyle choices, such as overeating or undereating, substance use, and physical inactivity. These behaviors can contribute to various physical health problems, to include obesity, malnutrition, and increased risk of chronic diseases. Before I started my own business, I had several soul sucking shitty jobs. I was so unhappy that when I got home, I sat on the couch, turned my TV on, and napped for two hours, ate dinner, and got ready for bed again. Not surprisingly, I gained weight due to my unhappiness. How we feel can have such a huge impact on our physical well-being. 

• Self-Care and Health Maintenance: Women experiencing mental health issues may neglect self-care and health maintenance, including regular medical check-ups, medication adherence, and personal hygiene. This neglect can lead to the worsening of existing conditions and developing new health issues. In my work as a Social Worker and Therapist, I encountered so many women who neglected themselves because they had so many burdens to carry. It’s so easy to “let yourself go” when you’re feeling down, neglect yourself, and are not feeling mentally well. The idea of a woman having “self-care” is still such a new concept because too many women feel guilty or selfish for taking care of themselves. To all my ladies, PLEASE TAKE CARE OF YOU!  Self-care doesn’t have to be expensive! It can be something as simple as taking a few minutes to yourself in the morning or at night, drinking coffee in silence without any distractions, going for a walk, etc.

There is so much more on how our physical health impacts our mental health but the above were some of the main points that I wanted to emphasize. As women, we are often forgotten as we try to be superwoman for everyone else but OURSELVES. 

Ladies, the only way for change to occur is we all start making changes for ourselves.  We have to be our own advocates by speaking up and saying that we deserve care!  We should not feel guilty that we are prioritizing our health. Sadly, why is this even a conversation that we have to have? Shouldn’t this just be the norm? Shouldn’t our physical and mental health be a priority and not be viewed as a privilege? 

As a woman, a mental health therapist, and coach, I am honored to use my voice and my platform to discuss the ongoing issues that continue to hold women back from expressing ourselves, our needs, and doing what is RIGHT for us.  We all deserve to be educated, be informed, be heard, and not be MANSPLAINED about what others think is best for us. So my beautiful badass ladies, keep showing up, keep asking away,  and always remember that you are WORTHY! GO ON; GO TAKE CARE OF YOU! 

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