WHY! WHY ME?!!

Hello! Hello! We are officially in full swing in May!! April showers have indeed brought May flowers. I can tell because my allergies are now in full bloom! I hope you had a restful and flow week. This past weekend, I had the chance to really take it slow, take care of my physical and mental health. As I looked at my calendars (I have 4 to include my work personal family calendar), I saw how busy my month and summer was already going to be! So any chance that I get to take it slow, I will! 

I know it feels that 2024 just started but we’re already in the fifth month of the year. This year has been a year of letting go, following my intuition, taking on new emotions, feelings, and being in situations that caused me to feel uncomfortable.  I am not going to lie, it’s been a challenging first few months of the year. A lot of it was my own doing and some of it was out of my control. 

In talking with people from my personal circle and with my clients, many of you are feeling more challenged than before emotionally, financially, and spiritually.  I hear it loud and clear, IT IS HARD RIGHT NOW for EVERYONE. Everyone is tired, exhausted, languishing, and just waiting for the universe to cut you some slack. You know what they say, when it rains, it pours. To some of you, it feels like it’s been a fucken category 5 hurricane that won’t ever let up. 

I’ve spoken about the diversity of my readers in relation to age, race/ethnicity, regional areas, and socioeconomic status. Regardless of our differences, we all feel the same emotions, struggle with hardships, and just want to be happy, healthy, and wealthy (in terms of money, life, and relationships). 

I discussed the diversity of my readers because our age, how we grew up, our coping skills, and the experiences that we have had, can be correlated to how we deal with setbacks when they occur. Even looking at my own experience as a person who is now 40 years old, I’ve learned to let go of A LOT of things that would have bothered me in my 30’s. The way that I grew up, being a child of refugees that came to the United States in 1979, having English as my second language, and growing up poor, I’ve had to be a survivor all my life. How I deal with setbacks is going to be vastly different from my nieces and nephews who were born with much more security and resources. 

Please know that I am not shaming or blaming anyone who had the fortune of being born into a family with more resources. What I am saying is hardships can be defined in various ways; when someone is born into a family that does not have as much resources as others, the component of being on survival mode versus not having to be on survival mode can make a huge difference including how you view challenges, setbacks, your ability to cope, and what you decide to do after processing the setback. 

I know some of you who are reading this are fed up and want to shake me and yell “Poiab!!! Stop it with all this damn bullshit and just allow me to feel the way I am feeling!!” And I assure you, please allow yourself to feel whatever it is that you are feeling. As a matter of fact, I encourage you to feel those negative emotions and be honest with how you’re feeling. That part is essential in order for you to move on. If you don’t process it, you may feel stuck, which may be a barrier for you in moving forward. 

Regardless of your status, your age, or the resources that you have, anyone can be RESILIENT. Being resilient means having the ability to cope, adapt, and maintain psychological well-being from stressors and in times of crisis. So what are some ways you can do to  maintain resilience during SHIT ASS times:   

• Learn from the challenges: One of the most important things to do is view tough times as opportunities for personal growth and learning. Reflect on what you've learned from past challenges and how you can apply those lessons to the current and future situations. 

• Maintain Perspective: Try to see the bigger picture and remind yourself that tough times are temporary. Reflect on past challenges and how you've overcome them to gain perspective.
  
  
• Rejection is redirection: Sometimes, we get rejected from the awesome school that we dreamed of attending, getting that bombass job, or that hot potential romantic partner who rejected us; a reminder to yourself that rejection is redirection. Sometimes, rejection is the universe looking out for you. 

• Positive Thinking:  Your MINDSET is everything!  It’s essential to cultivate a positive mindset by focusing on solutions rather than dwelling on problems. Look for opportunities for growth and have the ability to reflect even in difficult situations will help you. 

• Focus on What You Can Control: Notice that this step tends to be on the list in most of my blogs? Well there is a reason. There is only so much YOU CAN CONTROL. You must identify the aspects of the situation that you have control over, such as your attitude, actions, and how you respond to this. Dwelling on situations that you cannot control will drain you! So direct your energy toward things that are in your control. 

Forging your own path is not easy and during this journey, you will have to learn how to deal with setbacks, rejection,  may even be broken (financially, spiritually, physically, and emotionally), feel as though your dreams and hopes have been shattered. When you’re in it, to you at that moment, it feels as though nothing can ever revive you again. It’s so easy to go down that dark hole that will consume you. Honestly, at times, that path seems easier than the alternative. 

The  alternative path is picking yourself up, drying your tears, getting up and facing each day, this is the harder path. Why? Because it means that you haven’t GIVEN UP on yourself. It means that you still BELIEVE in you and you’re not going to let some stupid setback/s break you. I know that you don’t want to hear this but the universe chose you because it knows that if anyone can handle this, it’s YOU QUEEN. Queens don’t wait around. They TAKE CONTROL AND MAKE THINGS HAPPEN!  They keep getting up, keep trying, and know that NOTHING gets in their way.  YOU GOT THIS BOO!

FEELING INSPIRED AND WANT OTHER WOMEN TO BECOME BADASSES QUEENS?  TELL THEM TO SUBSCRIBE!